Finally! Indubitably the Last ABC Show Blog You’ll See This Year


For Guest Wednesday, our pal Matt is back after months of gentle prodding from his dw Heather.

My wife went to this ABC show in Las Vegas.  It’s some big convention at the big convention center with lots of car seats and other stuff for kids.  But there are no kids there, which is good.  They apparently put fake kids in the car seats to demonstrate them.  Or maybe jockeys.  Some of the stuff at the show has LATCH, which I was informed a couple of months ago does not mean Lines Attached To Car Hooks, though my way certainly is more descriptive.  That was like finding out there’s no Tooth Fairy.  Anyway, I got to hear about this show one evening, the same day that I had ridden my bike really far and could barely move.  So I lay there on the bed, unable to escape to do something useful like lose consciousness or rearrange my socks, and listened to the account of the show.  I heard about 20% of what she said and understood nearly 5% of it.  The parts of the conversation that I generally understood went something like this (as a guide, stuff in italics are things I merely thought, but did not say out loud, as far as I can recall).

Her:  So parking at this show is really expensive.  And you have to park really far from the entrance and have to walk really far.

Me:  Grmpphh.

Her:  Right.  And then you walk in, and the place is just huge are there are car seat booths all over the place and really cool stuff to look at.  So I took out my camera . . .

Me:  I wonder if all of the dark socks are where they belong, or are they mixed in with the white socks?  That would really be a bummer if they were all mixed up and I had to try to pick them out when I’m barely awake in the morning, and then I’ll end up with the wrong color of socks at work and people will make fun of me.  Again.

Her:  . . . and then security came by and told me I couldn’t take pictures because I didn’t have a press pass . . .

Me:  I wonder what that speck is on the carpet.  Is that a bug?  It’s not really moving, so it probably isn’t a bug.  It must be some sock fuzz.  Maybe I should go make sure the socks are properly arranged.

Her:  . . . so [insert random name of person I don’t know] took the pictures for me because [s]he had a press pass!  And then [person’s name] just gave the camera back to me and the security person didn’t care!  Isn’t that cool?

Me:  Yes.

Her:  Then we went to this little booth and they put us in this room in the back and installed a new seat for us.  It was so cool!

Me:  Did everyone have matching socks?

Her:  What?  Are you even listening to me?

Me:  Yes.

Her:  So after that we had lunch, and the pizza was $11.  Can you believe that?  $11!

Me:  Yes.

Her:  There was more great stuff.  One place had these blocks that fit together and you can build famous buildings, like that one in New York City….

Me:  The Eiffel Tower.

Her:  All I can think of is the Eiffel Tower….

Me:  Dang, we’re either psychic or our minds are similarly demented.  Most likely the latter.

Her: …which building is it?

Me:  The Empire State Building.

Her:  Yeah, the Empire State Building.  Anyway, they’re really cool.  I got a free keychain.

Me:  Woo hoo.  Another keychain.  Because we don’t have enough of those lying around the house.  They reproduce like the belt clips that are all over the place.

Me:  Cool.  We can always use another keychain.

Her:  Anyway, the show was great.  I have to go write a blog about it.

Me:  I have an idea for a new guest blog.

Her:  What is it?

Me:  You’ll see once I’ve written it.


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